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momma to3 boys · **Joined:** Fri Aug 31, 2007 2:34 pm **Posts:** 171

i am having such a hard time,i can not shop ,i have 2 gifts under the tree.i feel so bad,but i feel like i cant have Christmas without Chris.last year was my 1st.i think i was in shock.this year i am struggling.i feel so alone

Cindy · **Posted:** Mon Dec 17, 2007 12:58 am

Oh Carla, I know you're probably thinking it's my solution to everything but is there someone else that can do your shopping for you? I know how hard it is those first few years and there is nothing wrong with needing and asking for help. I'm going to pray that there is someone that you can get to help you with this. I wish I was there and I would but since I'm not I'm going to pray someone will.
Love and hugs, Cindy

JANE_E · **Posted:** Mon Dec 17, 2007 4:03 am

Carla,

This is my second Christmas without my son also. It's harder than last year....... I know what you mean. I've cried so much, begged God to help me and I guess he has because Finally, I've wrapped my packages and finished my tree.

I've completed my shopping over the internet. I could not shop uptown. The second year is really, so far anyway, really much worse than the first. I've become disabled by my grief.

I hear you my friend and I understand so well what you're feeling and saying. I've just forced myself to do every single thing I've done so far.

I've done it by telling myself, this might be my last Christmas here. I want my loved ones to know how much I love them so I will provide as good a Christmas as I can for them. I want their memories of me to be filled with the love I've shown to them.

Love you my friend,
jane

Barbara · **Posted:** Mon Dec 17, 2007 12:56 pm

Carla,
This is my first Christmas without Michael,and I too think I'm still in shock.I can't really give you any advice because I don't have any for myself. I can only keep you in my thoughts and prayers that God will help you through this difficult time.
Love you and many,many {{{{Hugs}}},
Barbara

Cece · **Posted:** Mon Dec 17, 2007 2:53 pm

I wish I had some advise for you, but I don't. This is my first Christmas without Laura. I miss her phone calls so much. She loved, loved ,loved to talk on the phone. I ,for some reason, don't. Now, I'd give almost anything for the phone to ring and have it be her. Last Christmas she called me at least once a day to tell me about her shopping trips and what she got for everyone. I did not put up a tree. I did buy Christmas presents. But, like Jane I did all my shopping on line. I will pray for all of us.

MissingMyMelody&Mommy · **Posted:** Mon Dec 17, 2007 7:52 pm

The only reason I have is tree is for my other children. Thankfully it is one that is prestrung with lights so all we had to do was put a few other ornaments on there and the Angel Tree Topper. As for shopping, I've done NONE. The presents that are under my tree are from a husband/wife team that lives down the road and knew about the money situation, Melody and our issues with the van. They brought them up here Saturday night and I cried at their generosity. If it wasn't for them, there wouldn't be any presents under our tree or even on the way. Anyway, I want you to know that I am thinking of you and sending lots of love, peace, hugs, prayers and white light to you.

Love,
Crystal

Lynda · **Posted:** Mon Dec 17, 2007 10:27 pm

Dear Carla,
HUGS!!!! I remember my first year...Garion's accident happened 4 months prior and I was in shock, numb. My second year I was very bitter and angry. This will be my 3rd...and I don't know how I feel yet. I have gotten good at wearing my mask...and I am able to focus on Calyn & Rylon a little better...but my heart still hurts and it always will.
Do what you can. Don't be afraid to ask for help. And if you do nothing...that is fine too. Sending you lots of hugs and prayers.
Hugs,
Lynda

larceneaux · **Joined:** Mon Aug 27, 2007 10:39 pm **Posts:** 26

Carla...It does get harder doesn't it...One day at a time you can do this. I hate to be in the stores at this time of the year...All that fa la la la la stuff....Not for me. What I've learned to do is make my list right after Christmas...All through the year pick up one here and there. Then when Christmas comes I don't have but last minute things. I just can't do all the Christmas shopping. It's so draining. I feel for you, I know exactally how you feel. The Holidays will never be the same, our lives will never be the same. But yet we continue on, because our Faith. God Bless.
HUGS
Lisa
www.tyler-arceneaux.memory-of.com

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