HOW TO DEAL WITH A LOVED ONES BIRTHDAY

heidi_1395 · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 5:33 am

:cry: I LOST MY SON WHEN HE WAS FOUR WELL ON OCTOBER 13TH HE WOULD BE 12 YEARS OLD.AFTER ALL THIS TIME I STILL DO NOT KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH HIS BIRTHDAY.MY FAMILY GOES TO THE CEMATARY AND PUT BALLONES AND FLOWERS THE WHOLE WORKS,WELL I HAVE NOT DONE IT AND I COULD USE SOME ADVISE ON HOW TO GET THE COURGE AND STRENGTH TO GO WITH MY HUSBAND,STEP KIDS,SISTER AND NEPEW.ANY ONE HAVE ANY IDEAS???

Tonya · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 8:12 am

Welcome to our family Heidi. I am so very, very sorry for your loss. It's very nice to have you here, I just wish it were under different circumstances.

To me, this is a decision that only you can make. You will know when you are ready to take that step to go to your son's resting place. And until that time comes, you need to do what works for you. Honestly, yesterday was my Jaydon and Jordan's Birthday/Angelversary.....I couldn't bring myself to go to their resting place. I just don't have the strength to do it.

Please know that here you will find the greatest bunch of people that you could ever ask for. You will find nothing but compassion, warmth, love and caring. You are welcome here anytime. We will always be here for you.

Sending you many hugs.....

Lynda · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 8:59 am

Dear Heidi,
I am so sorry you have a reason to be here but I do welcome you into our hearts. Tonya said it perfectly, this is the greatest bunch!
I don't think there is a right or wrong way to celebrate our Angels birthdays. As his mom, you do what you can and know that we will be here for you to talk to. It doesn't matter how many years pass, once our babies ALWAYS our babies. Our desire to have them with us will always be there. Sending you many (((HUGS))) and I look forward to getting to know you and your precious son better.
Hugs,
Lynda

Cindy · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 9:26 am

Heidi,
I'm so sorry about your son. I will keep you in my prayers. We lost our twins Wayne and Buck almost 22 years ago and our oldest son B.J. almost 4 years ago, so I know how hard it can be.
Like Tonya said you have to do what works for you. Though it does sound like it's your hearts desire to go with your family but you're just too scared. So, you ask the Lord for the strength and courage you need and I will agree with you and ask Him too and if it's what you're suppose to do then I believe you will be able to do it. You know Heidi, courage is not being unafraid...courage is being afraid and doing it anyway.
Sending you many hugs to carry you through these hard days.
Love and prayers, Cindy

Barbara · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 9:56 am

Heidi,
I'm sorry for the loss of your son.I feel you need to just follow your heart and you will know when your ready.Everyone deals with grief in different ways.I will keep you in my prayers for god to help you find the strength and peace you need.And welcome to our group these are the best group of moms and dads you could ask for.
Lvove and Hugs,
Barbara

Susan · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 12:28 pm

Heidi,

((((((((((Heidi))))))))))

You have to do what is comfortable for you to honor the day your angel was born.

Love and hugs,
Susan

Cece · **Posted:** Tue Oct 09, 2007 2:33 pm

Heidi, Going to the cemetery for the first time is hard hard hard!!! I am ashamed say that my dad died in 3/89. Well, since his funeral I didn't go the his grave site until this past June. I cried and talked to him. Cleaned up his plot and went away feeling closer to him then I have in years. A month later my daughter died. I have no doubt he was there to welcome her to heaven.

HOW TO DEAL WITH A LOVED ONES BIRTHDAY

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