Today should be Kevin's 2nd wedding anniversary

Jo* · **Posted:** Mon Oct 29, 2007 3:20 pm

Hello my forum family,

I'm struggling emotionally today. Kevin and Pam were to have gotten married Oct. 29, 2005. A big wedding was planned, the bride had her gown, the bridesmaids all had their gowns, the cake and flowers had been ordered and paid for, the dj was paid for, the hall and catering were all paid for.

I watched Pam say her vows to Kevin, while he lay at rest in the funeral home. He was buried with his wedding ring on his left hand.

Pam did have a photo taken of her wearing her wedding down, then it was heirloomed and placed in a box.

The dress I bought for Kevin's wedding hangs in a spare bedroom closet, still with the tags on, a plastic bag neatly covers it. I've told everyone, that's the dress I will be buried in when my time comes to go home.

I am so tired of the emotional struggle to survive each and everyday. Today is one of those days, I just want to curl up and withdraw from the whole world.

Love & {{Hugs}},
Jo (Kevin's Mom forever and ever)

Tonya · **Posted:** Mon Oct 29, 2007 3:30 pm

Jo....

My thoughts and prayers are with you today and always. How sweet it is that Kevin was buried with his wedding band on. Days like today are always tough and I wish I knew the right words to say; but I don't. So, I will tell you that I'm always here for you, no matter what. And....I love you.

Sending many hugs,
~Tonya~

Lynda · **Posted:** Mon Oct 29, 2007 3:37 pm

Dear Jo,
My heart breaks for you and I honestly could not imagine the pain of you watching your son marry the love of his life at his funeral...this brings such huge tears to my eyes. Know that I am praying for you and for Pam. (((HUGS))) on this difficult day and every day.
Hugs,
Lynda

JANE_E · **Posted:** Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:20 pm

Dear Jo,

It sounds as if Pam recognized Kevin as her soul mate and knew that the love they shared was stronger than death. I admire her for that. She stood firm in her commitment to him. As unbearably painful as it was for you, you had to have felt some comfort that her love for him was that strong.

I know with Kelli and Scott coming back together so firmly during his last three weeks, setting aside the divorce and recommitting to each other, I gained comfort from that. I knew Scott never stopped loving her and I knew she still loved him. I tried to tell them they needed to tell it to each but they were so separated by the pain of their divorce. But, the minute he entered the hospital, I called Kelli and she came and never left. It helped me to see that in his last hours, his beloved wife was at his side. I truly believe that in their case, the divorce was not recognized by God. He brought them together and he meant until death parted them. "Whom God hath joined together, let not man put asunder..... " They had a beautiful wedding in the Church so the judge who granted the divorce really had no say in the big picture. Kelli bought the plot beside Scott and the headstone already has her name on it just waiting for the final engraving part of it.

Kevin now has his wedding ring from his beloved Pam and she has taken her vows to be his wife. I find that so wonderful, so loving of her. How excruciating it had to have been for her, for you, for her family and for all their friends who had rejoiced with them. I'm so sorry Jo. I can envision the entire thing and it makes me cry. It brings a little comfort that he took so much love with him, but just losing him is so painful a heart can never heal from that loss.

It seems as if fall has brought on a new layer of grief for all of us. Everyone is feeling a strong sense of sorrow now..... I guess it could be the holidays coming up..... I don't know but I have such a longing for my son . I know that each of you feel the same for your own child.

I love you Jo and I will say a prayer for you,
love, hugs, prayers,
jane

Barbara · **Posted:** Mon Oct 29, 2007 8:07 pm

Jo,
My heart just breaks for you and Pam.Your in my thoughts and prayers.
love and hugs,
Barbara

Cindy · **Posted:** Mon Oct 29, 2007 11:16 pm

Jo, I'm so sorry it's so hard. There just isn't any words to help is there? Please know I'm praying for you. I'm sorry too that I didn't read this sooner, it's been a day here too.
Love and prayers, Cindy

Today should be Kevin's 2nd wedding anniversary

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