Grief and Bereavement forum groups

Shouldnt I be ok by now?
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Author:  Missing my parents [ Tue Feb 14, 2012 3:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Shouldnt I be ok by now?

I am 44 years old, my mother died in May 29,2005 it was the longest 47 days in the hospital of my life. I am the 2nd oldest of 5 girls and my Mother was my best friend. We had lunch at least twice a week and coffee each Sunday on her back porch. I went through all the stages of grief but shouldn't it be easier for me now? its been 6 years, 8 months, and 15 days since I watched her take her last breath. I miss her so much I find that it will consume me on most days..Making it hard for me to do my job. Anything that happens in my life I feel so all alone . Like I can be in a room full of people and I still feel totally alone. I know I am not alone, I know I have my children, Husband, Sisters, friends. but I FEEL all alone. I feel as though no one can love me as my Mother loved me. No one understands what I feel only my Mother. Is this normal? Shouldn't I still missing her but moved on by now?

Author:  mmlo [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 6:40 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Shouldnt I be ok by now?


I read your post and was touched by your dilemma. To here of the loss of your Mom is sad to say the lease. The death of a loved one is one of the most devastating experiences a human can face. Understandably at times the loss may seem unbearable. Moms are such a precious and irreplaceable part of our lives! We hold them so dear and near to our hearts!

There is no correct way to grieve or set timeline. Some are able to move on relatively easily. Others cannot. There is no deadline at which point you should think you should feel better. What are your thoughts? Do you personally feel that you are overwhelmed by sorrow? If so make sure to take care of yourself. It sounds like you have friend and family who want to help you; accept their help! Cherish the memories of you and your mom! Turn them in to the source of comfort you need. Writing your feeling down may help. It might prove to be an outlet for your emotions and help you to work through your grief.

Grief is a strange thing. We were never meant to have to go through such an ordeal. You mentioned that loneliness was something that you are dealing with although there are still many love ones surrounding you. My heart goes out to you. Please be assured that you are not alone in your grief. (Psalm 34:18 - “Jehovah is near to those that are broken at heart”, Psalms 83: 18.) God is a hearer of prayer and will help you to endure your loss. (Psalms 65:2)

In spite of all that we feel during times like these there is good news! The Bible holds out the wonderful hope of the resurrection for our dead loved ones. We will see them again!! John 5: 28, 29 “ Do not marvel at this, because the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out, those who did good things to a resurrection of life, those who practiced vile things to a resurrection of judgment.

Where will the resurrection take place? Right here on earth! Matt 5:5 “Happy are the mild-tempered ones, since they will inherit the earth. Ps 37:29 says. The righteous themselves will possess the earth, and they will reside forever upon it. By means of God’s Kingdom, that you pray for (when you say the Lord’s Prayer “….Let you Kingdom come, let you will take place on earth as it is in heaven” (King James Version), this wonderful hope will take place. It is a promise from our all mighty Creator! Why not get your bible and read the aforementioned scriptures for yourself!

I hope this will bring you a measure of comfort. Don’t be afraid to move on with your life. You will never forget your mom! Grief is an individual thing, but don’t forget that you still have to make the best of the life that is ahead of you!

Author:  akila [ Fri Jan 25, 2013 12:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Shouldnt I be ok by now?

i think it is okay for you miss her. moving on doesn't mean putting an end to how you feel or miss you mother. moving on simply means accepting her death and be yourself

Author:  devinderjit [ Tue Jul 30, 2013 7:13 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Shouldnt I be ok by now?

Take comfort in the fact that the love and care you shared with her is a both a gift of memory to you that will remain forever.

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