It's so hard

Cindy · **Posted:** Sat Dec 01, 2007 11:09 pm

Buddy,
It's hard, it's so hard. I've been doing ok today but it's caught me Buddy. I can't stand this pain. I miss you so much. It's less than 3 hours until 11:25pm, the time you died. Everything is coming back on me Buddy. All those hard memories. The having to say good-bye to my Buddy. The having to come home without you. The knowing that my heart is forever broken and there's no changing it. No more hugs, no more I love yous, no more holding your hand and blessing you. Nothing... I get nothing else until I come to Heaven and that's probably going to be a long time Buddy.
We cleaned and fixed your grave today. We made it look nice for you but B.J. it's not suppose to be this way. We went to the parade of lights for you but it wasn't the same with you not there.
God I miss you till I can't stand it. Why did Jesus make you leave me Buddy? I wasn't ready to let you go.
I try to be strong. I try to encourage others that are forced to go through this living hell that I go through. I try to do what the Lord wants me to do. But none of it makes my heart stop hurting. None of it gives you back to me.
Mama feels so broken tonight B.J., please ask Jesus to help me.
I love you Buddy, I'll always love you. You'll always be my Best Buddy in the Whole World and I'll miss you forever.
Love, Mama

Barbara · **Posted:** Sat Dec 01, 2007 11:20 pm

Cindy,
I wish there was something I could say or do to take your pain away.Just know your in my thoughts and prayers.
Love you and many,many {{{Hugs}}},
Barbara

Cece · **Posted:** Sun Dec 02, 2007 3:14 pm

Cindy, With tears in my eyes I read your letter to BJ. As much pain as I am in this first Christmas without Laura, I wish that I could take yours away. I'm trying to get through this by focusing on the real meaning of Christmas, not the secular one. I love you and I pray for you. God Bless. Lucy

larceneaux · **Joined:** Mon Aug 27, 2007 10:39 pm **Posts:** 26

Cindy...I am so sorry that you are going through this pain. It's a hard road that we travel on everyday. I'll never understand God's plan. I've often thought that maybe God wants me to help other bereaved mothers...It is hard. There is nothing that I can do or say to take your pain away. Only know that you are in my prayers and your handsome B.J...Your little buddy...and his brothers Buck & Wayne hold you when you need it the most. By the Grace of God we continue on, one day at a time.

Sending HUGS & prayers your way, my dear friend.
HUGS
Lisa

www.tyler-arceneaux.memory-of.com

Tonya · **Posted:** Mon Dec 03, 2007 9:38 am

Cindy,

I am sending you many, many (((hugs))). I wish there was something that I could do, anything, to bring your precious B.J. back to you; if there was I'd do it in a heartbeat.

I love you...
~Tonya~

momma to3 boys · **Joined:** Fri Aug 31, 2007 2:34 pm **Posts:** 171

CINDY ,I SEND YOU A BIG HUG.I AM SO SORRY.

It's so hard

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